Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Kicking It Listmaker Stylee

Happy birthday to Weasel! Yep, today marks the one year point of this humble blog. I could have chosen to have marked the occasion in a myriad of ways, but decided that a Listmaker style photo gallery from my recent trip to Sugarloaf USA over in Carabassett would do fine.

We went to visit our old friends Diana and Scott "Boss" Hogg over at their mountain pad. Despite the fact that I hadn't skied in 15 years, I had a blast. We even convinced my mother and her husband Mark to give it a shot....

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Sugarloaf USA, home of Bode Miller. Move aside Miller, here comes the Weasel.
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Dinah, Mr & Mrs Weasel's pride and joy, looking noble. Bailey (the other pride and joy) was off rolling in deer droppings
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Our Hosts #1: Boss Hogg (with the dreads and beard)....
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Our Hosts #2: Lady Di (with helmet and goggles)
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Mr. & Mrs. Weasel, Maine schlubs or rugged outdoors types eschewing high fashion?
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Mother and Mark strike a mountain pose
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See Frankenstein ski! See Frankenstein chase pretty lady down hill!
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I passed out before I could reach the hot tub

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

TV Sports Aren't Even Trying Anymore

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Pontiac- separating Rednecks from their money since the youngest still had teeth

With all apologies to Henry over at The Big Ball I'm not a basketball fan. The NCAA tournament leaves me cold every year, as up here in Maine we rarely even have the joys of local boosterism to get involved with as our men's and women's basketball programs are decidedly modest (the Frozen Four is another matter, even though the Black Bears stank it up this year). Like all over hyped thinly disguised excuses for gambling however there is no escaping it, with all the ESPNs, FSN, NESN, and CBS shunting interesting sports programming and television for the elderly off to the wings to make way for tall men in loose undershirts running around indoors.

It comes as no surprise that as with all things athletic and American that this snoozefest is swimming in corporate money and attempts to make you buy crap. No real complaints there; I understand that someone has to pay to keep the lights on, and if you can get a big corporate sugar daddy to do it, all the better. Its not like the sponsors influence the results and I can take a logo or two on the floor or field.

Still, it is my custom to keep an eye out for the crassest display of advertising trying to masquerade as corporate benevolence. So far the award has to go to Pontiac, for their $150,000 in scholarships that viewers get to allocate based on an online poll as to who played the best game (I don't think I'm doing this crappy stunt justice: more can be found here, including a video of Greg Gumbel explaining the whole pointless exercise).

Pontiac positions itself as empowering the fans, rewarding great skill, and endowing much needed money for scholarships. They are given credibilty in this effort by CBS sports who lend their talent to promote this and by the NCAA who host the information on their website and allow Pontiac and GM in general to use their logo and the phrase "March Madness" in advertising. As with all advertising, this is of course bullshit.

The vote for best play is meaningless and I would suggest based on flashy moves judged subjectively (if we all really understood what wins a game we'd all be coaches); no difference from 90% of decisions we make everyday really I suppose. If it stopped there, as a bit of meaningless fun, I wouldn't have a problem with it. What really annoys me is that for the cost of the campaign and $150,000 Pontiac gets to position itself as friendly to the scholar athlete. In reality, Pontiac needs to only sell around 20 of its mid-sized sedans to dealerships to recoup the cost of the scholarship package; even for a troubled car brand like Pontiac $150,000 is less than their executive bathroom toilet tissue budget I suspect. What is more, the $150,000 is being dolled out in chunks of $5000. Handy for an individual, but not really a big difference when added to the general scholarship fund.

So here's the executive summary of the above:
Pontiac is a cheap company pretending to to be Daddy Warbucks. Besides, it seems that every single car accident or head on collision involving a barely-out-of-adolecence goober here in Maine contains the sentence "Recovery vehicles pulled the 1992 Pontiac Grand Am out of the ditch/lake/side of the barn/moose's carcass/trailer picture window..." The scholarship fund thing is a crappy stunt, Greg Gumbel is a bit of a whore, and the NCAA is beyond appalling.
Fin.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Motherrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

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Just a quick note to say the muthah and her consort are arriving from London today for a 10 day jaunt through the mud and snowbanks of Northern New England, so I doubt there will be much activity from me for the next little while.

However, rather than leave you empty handed, please enjoy the following, found on Can't Stop The Bleeding, proving that even illiterate and ornery superheroes have caught the blog bug:
HULK'S DIARY THAT IS ON THE INTERNET

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

The Magic of The Asbo

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The British as a people, bless their little cotton socks, are spectacularly unsuited to live on a small crowded island. Petty greivances, bitterness, and lack of consideration for others form a fairly large percentage of the national character along with the more noble stoicism, humor, and boiled vegetables. Until recently the only answer to anti-social behavior was the old British Empire: if a person on your street was annoying one either conspired to have him arrested and shipped to Australia or encouraged said miscreant to join the army or navy, go to the mysterious east, and die of typhoid. The native peoples of these regions quite understandably soon grew tired of being the repository of all of Great Britain's objectionable, stupid, rascist, drunk and incontinent buffoons and demanded independence. We were able to have many of our purple faced, genetically imballanced embarrasments from all social classes bumped off by various native insurgencies but all good things come to an end and the surviving disagreeable crowd returned (their vileness somewhat distilled by restrictive breeding practices) to spawn and generally make life less bearable on an island where one is never more than 70 miles from the sea but the ocean is too bloody cold to swim in.

Over time the Nimbys and Chavs, Blimps and Casuals, and so on came to dominate much of the country, especially as many of the hinterland's bright young things fled to London or overseas once they realized that the 11pm closing of pubs was unlikely to change in their prime drinking years. As a result, the unpleasant ones began to get on each others' nerves, to the point where "someone getting on your nerves" trumped fighting poverty and inequality, fixing health care, or coherently explaining the pros and cons of Europe in politicians' election manifestos (I believe Rudy Gulliani rode the same wave). The net result of all this neighbor from hell hype was the asbo, or Anti-Social Behaviour Order.

Armed with an Asbo local authorities can compel behavioral changes or mandate treatment, punishment, or even loss of property in regards to a persistent miscreant- the weird guy who won't stop pooping through your mail slot, or the loud woman on the corner who believes she is Eva Braun and plays Nazi marching songs at top volume all night. All well and good but it is suggested that sometimes Asbos' can go too far or are open to abuse. The BBC has a few intriguing examples: Asbowatch V: War on a G-string. You be the judge.

This one is my personal favorite:
A man addicted to sniffing fuel is now in jail after breaking an Asbo which banned him from petrol station forecourts across Teesside. Brian Taylor, 36, terrorised staff and customers after cutting pipes, sniffing petrol and dancing unnervingly. His habit of slashing hoses didn't particularly help his case after customers ended up soaked in fuel. Brian Taylor is receiving help for his problem.

"Terrorised staff and customers.... and dancing unnervingly"? These people have obviously never been drinking with Mr. RDOWM. Oh, points will be awarded for the best suggested use of an asbo among our little blogging coterie.

Sunday, March 13, 2005

The Warrior Poet Is A Tragedy As Old As Time Itself




I was driving into work last week listening to NPR's Morning Edition. As is their tradition, the last story of the day is arts-related. 50% of the time I find myself pushing in a cassette rather than listen to a profile of some terrible folk singer so as usual my finger hovered over the stereo as I made the turn onto Maine Route 17 for the high-speed run into Rockland. That morning however NPR was going to review a new documentary about American troops in Iraq so my hands returned to the steering wheel. I'm very glad that I gave Bowie's Hunky Dory a rest as the film, Gunner Palace, sounds amazing.

Essentially the film tells the story of the enlisted men of an American artillery unit, bunking in one of Uday Hussein's Baghdad palaces and converted from gunnery to foot patrol/police/crossing guard duty. As described on NPR the film seems to provide a new yet familiar set of images of the uneasy post-movement war in so far as it deals with the quotidian duties of the soldiers; images hammered home by freelancers and embeds, from Discovery Channel documentary series, and highbrow magazines and NPR stories. What I think will set this film apart from the standard pieces is its surprising concentration on the attempts by the soldiers to rationalize, explain, and escape their situations through music; specifically hip hop.

Listening to the story I was struck by the creative continuity between soldiers over the centuries and particularly by the parallels by the blessing and the bane of any British high schooler; the English soldier poets of the First World War.

Of course I wasn't able to find lyrics to any of the songs from Gunner Palace on line and wasn't able to retain enough of them from my drive, no matter desperately trying to remember as I pulled into the parking lot and raced to my desk for pen and paper. However, the above NPR link has snippets I believe, as does this piece from the New York Times.

The LA Weekly had this to say:
It’s easy to see why he (the director) got so attached: Nothing could be further than these men and women from the public image of mindlessly patriotic dim bulbs who sign on to the military because they have no other options. Patriotic they are, but many are also keenly aware that they are victims not only of an increasingly sophisticated insurgency, but of the muddled ideology behind the occupation. We see them playing happily with children in a Baghdad orphanage, then followed by little boys throwing rocks; hugging their Iraqi interpreters, one of whom turns out to be an insurgent plant; training local men in civil defense, then rooting out the “motherfucker” insurgents in brutal house-to-house searches. They know, as many anti-war activists often do not, that it may not be possible to go into battle without working up a head of steam against the enemy. Yet they understand precisely what a no-win situation both they and the Iraqis are in — that it is psychologically and practically impossible to function as policemen and social workers at the same time. They know they are hated, and what hurts them most is their perception that back home, a public — not hostile this time, but desensitized by the nightly news — doesn’t understand what it feels like to be them. Courtesy of Gunner Palace, the anguished freestyle rap lyrics of two of the unit’s black soldiers have landed them on the cover of the Sunday New York Times Arts and Leisure section. That’s not nothing, but in the words of Specialist Richmond Shaw, “For y’all this is just a show — we live in this movie.”

Once you have had a chance to check out the lyrics, I recommend revisiting the work of the "war poets" of 1914-18, in particular my favorite Wilfred Owen. Given the intervening 90 or so years the voice is very different, as are the language, circumstances, and relative situations of the authors. That said, I think it is obvious where the similarities lie once superficial cultural distinctions are stripped away. The one major difference to my mind is that Owen's elegant and elagic writing, removed from time and place by the passage of time, is so beautiful and of another time that even its most horrific passages seem wrapped in the cotton wool of horribly restrained Edwardian tragedy (at the time, it was very shocking). Sort of like a Merchant Ivory remake of a Sam Pekinpah film, if you will.

Three of the bitterest, most jarring and most poignant Owen poems can be found below. Don't worry you ADD freaks, they're short.

Dulce Et Decorum Est
Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots
But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of tired, outstripped Five-Nines that dropped behind.

Gas! Gas! Quick, boys!-An ecstasy of fumbling,
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time;
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling
And flound'ring like a man in fire or lime...
Dim, through the misty panes and thick green light,
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.

In all my dreams, before my helpless sight,
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.

If in some smothering dreams you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil's sick of sin;
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,-
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est
Pro patria mori.

Anthem for Doomed Youth
What passing-bells for these who die as cattle?
-Only the monstrous anger of the guns.
Only the stuttering rifles' rapid rattle
Can patter out their hasty orisons.
No mockeries now for them; no prayers nor bells;
Nor any voice of mourning save the choirs,-
The shrill, demented choirs of wailing shells;
And bugles calling for them from sad shires.

What candles may be held to speed them all?
Not in the hands of boys but in their eyes
Shall shine the holy glimmers of good-byes.
The pallor of girls' brows shall be their pall;
Their flowers the tenderness of patient minds,
And each slow dusk a drawing-down of blinds.

Asleep
Under his helmet, up against his pack,
After so many days of work and waking,
Sleep took him by the brow and laid him back.


There, in the happy no-time of his sleeping,
Death took him by the heart. There heaved a quaking
Of the aborted life within him leaping,
Then chest and sleepy arms once more fell slack.


And soon the slow, stray blood came creeping
From the intruding lead, like ants on track.


Whether his deeper sleep lie shaded by the shaking
Of great wings, and the thoughts that hung the stars,
High-pillowed on calm pillows of God's making,
Above these clouds, these rains, these sleets of lead,
And these winds' scimitars,
-Or whether yet his thin and sodden head
Confuses more and more with the low mould,
His hair being one with the grey grass
Of finished fields, and wire-scrags rusty-old,
Who knows? Who hopes? Who troubles? Let it pass!
He sleeps. He sleeps less tremulous, less cold,
Than we who wake, and waking say Alas!

Friday, March 11, 2005

History Friday: Hope For Blotchy Heads Everywhere

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Today is the day that Forbes releases its world's richest bastards list and so to distract myself from this celebration of skewed value systems (I want to start a worlds 400 poorest list, as well as cap income and estate values at $10 million: does anyone else need more? If they do how did they get so rich while being so profilgate? More on this at another time) I wandered back into the dusty archives of time to bring you another installment of History Friday:

March, 11 1985: Gorbachev becomes Soviet leader
"There is a new man in charge at the Kremlin - Mikhail Gorbachev has taken over following the death of Konstantin Chernenko.

Chernenko, 73, died yesterday after a long illness - but his death was only announced to the Soviet people this morning. Sombre music preceded the news on radio and television and scheduled programmes were cancelled.
The speed of naming of his successor - at 54 the youngest man to take over as general secretary of the Soviet communist party - has taken people by surprise."

My interest in all things Soviet has been previously documented, an obsession that arose while living in Germany not far from the old DDR border under the shadow of cruise missiles and SS-20s. A visit to Berlin in 1984 further cemented my pre-pubescent fascination with "the east" and so when Gorbachev came on the scene the year after we moved back to England I precociously resolved to carefully follow this interesting man.

To my mind Gorbachev, not Reagan, ended the Cold War and not because he lost an ideological battle. His position and worldview was much more complex than the celluloid fantasies lived out by the Gipper. One of the greatest tragedies of our era (and perhaps the blackest mark on Gorbachev's legacy) was the fact that Mikhail Sergeyevich lost control of the USSR and had to hand over the task of easing the Soviet Union out of state capitalism into proto-democracy in the less capable and more avaricious hands of others. It is my firm belief that the cause of Russian freedom and progress has been set back by at least a decade by the mess that followed Gorbachev's ouster and hangs in the balance even today. It is criminal that after Gorbachev set the ball rolling by allowing the Baltic States to become independent it took 14 years for a semblance of true democracy to reach Georgia and the Ukraine. Belarus still labors under a fascist kleptocracy, as do many of the Soviet's Asian former possesions. Mother Russia herself is weak, loosing grip on her hard won civil rights and freedoms, dying of AIDS and losing a demographic battle that could have dire consequences for world economies and security.

Sort of makes you miss the old days, don't it? Come on, all together, sing! (I recommend the full Bolshoi Chorus wav. or the Red Army choir MP3 versions, about half way down the page. This has to be one of the most awesome sounding national anthems ever- it even made me happy to see the hammer and sickle rise at the Olympics knowing I'd get to hear a snippet of this).

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Blind Justice And A Vigilante Fiancee

In retrospect, insisting that Mrs. Weasel and myself watch back-to-back eposides of Gordon Ramsay's Boiling Point on BBC America last night was not the best preparation for trying to change the channel to ABC for the long-anticipated debut of the bound-to-be-terrible Blind Justice. For although she took great pains to verbalize how abhorent she found Ramsay's management style and how if any employer spoke to her like that she would apply shoe leather to testes in a less than coddling manner and walk out it was obvious that she was taking copious mental notes. This was proven when I went to change the channel, only to be met with a statement akin to:

"Touch that remote and take us anywhere the ABC network and the only blind justice you will see tonight will be me smashing your face in with said channel changer."

Call me a wuss (whatever, you big mucho macho Tom Arnold) but for all intents and purposes I am alone here in the Maine wilderness and I have read Dolores Claiborne. She shall have no argument from me, and y'all with have no Blind Justice review.

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Orangepulp

This is a fantasically odd blog which I find strangely soothing:

Orangepulp

No word on whether he or she owns the trees and the groves.

Monday, March 07, 2005

While On The Subject...


Happier times at Carrow Road
Norwich is in the news, and not for the best of reasons. Fresh from my reverie below about tasty condiments and strange dialect words, the mighty Norwich City Canaries have made it onto Can't Stop The Bleeding, a superior sports blog that spans the globe like the BBC's Grandstand does or ABC's Wide World Of Sports used to:

Can't Stop The Bleeding: Delia's Howard Dean Moment

When a struggling football club's frumpy but loveable celebrity chef chairman can't get up at half time and yell at the assembled supporters like a Milwall Bushwacker kicking off in a Luton pub without getting derided in the press I don't know what the beautiful game has come to.

Friday, March 04, 2005

Nostalgia Ain't What It Used To Be


Now avaliable in a handy squeeze tube
I was getting ready to turn my gimlet eye on past world events for a traditional Wisdom Weasel History Friday entry when an email from an old college friend I hadn't communicated with in a decade hit the mailbox. Said friend had googled me with the sole and express intent of talking smack about tomorrow's upcoming fixture between his beloved Chelsea and my equally venerated Norwich City FC (see the The Shrewdness of Apes and scroll down to "All The Way Home" for more on the woeful season of NCFC, or check out either Walter Mondale or myself on the NYCanaries website). The email set me to thinking about my beloved homeland of Norfolk, England and its various cultural totems. This of course pressaged an hour of fevered googling of my own, seeking out the websites of childhood favorites and muttering to myself in the distinct dialect of the land of the Iceni.

If I was as smart as Listmaker I would get myself an Amazon wishlist and add this nugget I unearthed in my trip down memory lane: The Colmans Mustard Cookbook. Those of you Brooklyn types who hunger for good old down home Norfolk cooking, bug Walter Mondale to prepare you dressed crab or stew and dumpings with a slathering of Colmans- I don't know if its in the book but my grandmother does a mean variation on the latter.

But to my main obession tonight: Norfolk words. 10 points a word or phrase, 5 for most inventive guess, for all who deign to tackle definitions for the following list (Mondale, you are disqualified):

Squit
On the huh
Bishy barney bee
Dwile
Rum
Dodman (or Hodmatod)
Bor
Mawther
Blar
Dickey
On the sosh
Rorping
Loke
Keptatometagotaterin

Good luck.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

I Forgot I Wrote This

One from the "I'd forgotten I'd written this column" file, here's an old Face bit I wrote from 2002 that I've always had an untoward affection for. I re-discovered it while turfing out a bunch of correspondence related to my recently chopped column in said magazine (sniff). Enjoy:

MANIC DEPRESSION: A CHAT WITH A ROOSEVELT ERA RELIC
Given the current economic climate many people are concerned that we might be living through a new great depression. Mindful of the saying “It is a recession when your neighbor gets fired, a depression when you do,” I decided to put current circumstances into historical perspective through an interview with Herbert Beal of Mooselookmeguntic, survivor of the original great depression and professional old man.


Herbert supplements his income modeling ugly fleeces for LL Bean

I met up with Herbert at the Big Puffin Farms gas station, as he indulged in his favorite pastime, frustrating the other patrons’ attempts to pay as he monopolized the register scratching instant win lottery tickets. I purchased two cups of scalding hot road tar from a pump jug labeled “Hazel-Mocha-Latte-Nut” and accompanied by Herbert, set up the tape recorder on an upturned Oakhurst crate over by the frozen dinners. The verbatim interview transcript follows below.

WW: Herbert, you were born in 1920, which made you of middle school age when the depression hit Maine. How were your school days?

HB: There were 6 students in my school back then. This, of course, was before the consolidation craze, so there were a lot of smaller schools. In our town of 400, there were 38 schools, all of which covered the full K-12 curriculum. I walked five miles to school and back every day of the year, if we had classes or not. It built character.

WW: What did your parents do for a living?

HB: My father operated a rickshaw, transporting visiting “sports” from Boston from the railroad station to their mountain top cottages. Mother was permanently in labor from the age of fifteen but she still found time to keep house and earn a little by extracting phosphates from bat guano for use in industrial fertilizers. We never had much money but we never saw ourselves as poor. That’s because we couldn’t afford a mirror.

WW: Did the depression really affect you, given that you lived in the country?

HB: The first clue we got that the stock market was in trouble was when a couple of stockbrokers from New York hired father to row them out on the lake and throw them over the side of the boat. The lake was frozen of course, so father smacked them on the head with an oar, ransacked their pockets, and buried them in the root cellar. Father blew all their cash on moonshine and went blind. He tried to keep up with his rickshaw business but thanks to his blindness he took a wrong turn and lost the rickshaw and his passenger over the side of Snipe Mountain. That’s when the depression hit home.

WW: How did you fare through the lean times?

HB: It was rough keeping clean, for one thing. In those days, winter lasted from November to October, so we were unable to bathe in the lake after they repossessed our bathtub. Mother would take us once a month to Mechanic Falls where we would use the communal dust bath. We would strip and flap our arms about like starlings. Then mother would delouse us with asbestos and sew us into our long underwear until our next bath.

WW: Were you able to eat well despite your poverty?

HB: We were luckier than most because we had a few chickens that gave us eggs. That said, we couldn’t afford feed for the chickens and so they got to eat the eggs. We ate the shells. Mother would slather the shells with Raye's mustard, spread the mixture onto a piece of her homemade clamato bread and call it “crackling jack,” but we weren’t fooled. In the twenties, lobster was seen as a poor man’s food so many Mainers got by on that. We grew up inland and didn’t have access to lobster, so we substituted raccoon. Kids these days have so much, but I bet not one of them has enjoyed a traditional Maine raccoon bake with all the trimmings.

WW: The trimmings?

HB: You know: baked horse apples, fiddleheads, steamed poison oak, fiddlebottoms, dump clams, outhouse corn, and fiddlebits.

WW: Where was the government throughout all of this?

HB: Governor Baxter missed the depression, as he was obsessed with his “Underwood Typewriter” program, which was intended to give every seventh grader in Maine a typewriter until graduation. The Maine legislature was busy trying to water down the Governor’s plan for “Baxtopia,” his own private country in the North Woods. The federal government mistakenly thought Maine was part of Canada and refused to help.

WW: So you were basically on your own then?

HB: When I was in the sixth grade, I had to quit school and take a job. I left Mooselookmeguntic and walked to Farmington, a trip that took me eight weeks as my sense of direction had been impaired by generations of inbreeding. I worked as a delivery boy for Mr. Goyle, the mortician.

WW: A mortician’s delivery boy?

HB: In those days people paid for funerals by installment. As the depression set in, many people died early, before they had made full payment. Mr. Goyle was a fair man and would take the body on consignment and give the family a month to pay the balance. If they paid, the funeral went ahead. If they defaulted, they got the body back. It was my job to return the merchandise.

WW: How did you go about that?

HB: I had a delivery bicycle. We would load the casket into the basket, and I would pedal off to make a delivery. Of course, times were hard and we had a lot of returns, so Mr. Goyle was unable to pay for a decent bike. My bike was a big old Schwinn but it didn’t have any wheels.

WW: How did you manage?

HB: We were made of sterner stuff back then. I would sit and pedal like mad, basically dragging the bike and casket down the road by force of will. Without the wheels, the bike was low to the ground, and I would be constantly banging my knees on the underside of the handlebars. Without wheels, the mudguards would drag along the road, sending up a shower of sparks. Everyone would know it was me when I cycled by. “Look!” They would shout, “There goes ol’ Sparky Bleeding Knees the Corpse Hauler!”

WW: We should wrap up now Herbert, but one last question: when did the depression end for you?

HB: The good times came about with the start of World War Two. With my knees so badly damaged from the handlebars I was rated 4-F and instead served my country as a gigolo in the greater Portland area, comforting the wives of absent servicemen. After the war I went to college and trained as an aromatherapist. I still eat “crackling jack” to stay humble though.

WW: Herbert, thank you for your time.

HB: On your way out, grab me a couple of “Lucky Lucianos” and a “Waste-a-Dollar” scratch tickets, will ya? I need to get back to frustrating my fellow patrons.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Face Ache

Storms throw up the strangest websites:
fakefaces - A UK Lookalike Agency
My personal favorite is the unfortunate Vin Diesel doppelganger Carlos Lewis. The bloke above him, an alleged Richard Gere, looks more like Huey Lewis, but I guess there is no money in that. As for Marilyn Monroe, she looks like Cindy Lauper dressed as Marilyn Monroe.

Be warned, this site is horribly addictive in its parade of deluded humanity. You will spend hours muttering "looks nothing like him/her" will descending deeper into madness.
MainePages.com