From Beau Bo D'or
I have been watching some of the Republican convention this week and I think I understand John McCain's national security policy.
If John McCain is ever captured by Al Qadea, he won't talk, evah, even if they break his ribs. "Screw you bin Laden you Iranian bastard", he'll say, spitting his few remaining teeth into a grubby pail; "You and your Shia pal Putin might kill me, but you'll have Palin to deal with".
In fact, if he is elected the first thing he plans to do is to rip up the rose garden and install a runway so that we can take off in an A4 Skyhawk and bravely get shot down over our enemy's capital whenever a crisis arises. Nobody can crash an aircraft like John McCain: in fact he's built an entire career around being bad at his job.
"McCain had roughly 20 hours in combat," explains Bill Bell, a veteran of Vietnam and former chief of the U.S. Office for POW/MIA Affairs -- the first official U.S. representative in Vietnam since the 1973 fall of Saigon. "Since McCain got 28 medals," Bell continues, "that equals out to about a medal-and-a-half for each hour he spent in combat. There were infantry guys -- grunts on the ground -- who had more than 7,000 hours in combat and I can tell you that there were times and situations where I'm sure a prison cell would have looked pretty good to them by comparison. The question really is how many guys got that number of medals for not being shot down."
Ahh, what it is to be the son and grandson of an admiral.