Wednesday, September 03, 2008

This Convention is Pure Torture

From Beau Bo D'or

I have been watching some of the Republican convention this week and I think I understand John McCain's national security policy.

If John McCain is ever captured by Al Qadea, he won't talk, evah, even if they break his ribs. "Screw you bin Laden you Iranian bastard", he'll say, spitting his few remaining teeth into a grubby pail; "You and your Shia pal Putin might kill me, but you'll have Palin to deal with".

In fact, if he is elected the first thing he plans to do is to rip up the rose garden and install a runway so that we can take off in an A4 Skyhawk and bravely get shot down over our enemy's capital whenever a crisis arises. Nobody can crash an aircraft like John McCain: in fact he's built an entire career around being bad at his job.

"McCain had roughly 20 hours in combat," explains Bill Bell, a veteran of Vietnam and former chief of the U.S. Office for POW/MIA Affairs -- the first official U.S. representative in Vietnam since the 1973 fall of Saigon. "Since McCain got 28 medals," Bell continues, "that equals out to about a medal-and-a-half for each hour he spent in combat. There were infantry guys -- grunts on the ground -- who had more than 7,000 hours in combat and I can tell you that there were times and situations where I'm sure a prison cell would have looked pretty good to them by comparison. The question really is how many guys got that number of medals for not being shot down."

Ahh, what it is to be the son and grandson of an admiral.

3 comments:

The Sniper said...

You didn't mention that you got your information from a site called "Vietnam Veterans Against John McCain".

Transparency problem, weasel?

Let’s get the facts straight, shall we? Only six of his medals were for heroism and leadership during combat action. Two were Purple hearts (or are you going to say that he was wounded and tortured?) the rest were service medals. 20 hours engaged in actual aerial combat is a helluva lot. And the “7,000” hours of combat mentioned by McCain’s detractors on that site and quoted by you would mean those grunts were in combat every waking moment of their one year tours in country… and that is only if they slept 6 hours per night.

Was McCain the best pilot in the world? Hell no. Out of his five lost planes, I would have to discount two of those because one was lost to mechanical failure and one was shot down. I’m guessing you’ve never been in combat, but I have so I know what it’s like. I was one of those infantry guys you mentioned so I’ve never lost a plane, but I know what combat is like. Do you?

I don’t agree with either of that ticket’s stances on religion, abortion, and a lot of other social issues, but don’t knock the guy’s service if you’ve never been there and don’t just take some idiot’s word at face value without digging deeper just because it jives with your personal opinions.

That’s just my two cents. I have a feeling that I’m trying to teach a pig to whistle here, though.

weasel said...

Doot de doot doot (I can't type whistling).

My favorite Veteran joke:

Q. How many vets does it take to change a lightbulb?

A. You don't fuckin' know man, you weren't there.

He's a brave man, Sniper. But I don't feel that entitles him to the keys to the White House.

The Sniper said...

I never said it did. I just said that the facts and sources should be above board.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but people's opinions should be shaped by facts, not other people's opinions based on skewed and biased reporting.

And despite my suspicion that you were trying to mock me, I liked the joke, BTW. Ten bucks says you wouldn't have said it to my face, though.

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