Monday, November 22, 2004

GWB: A Shrub of Action

Man, wearing that flight suit on the deck of the Abraham Lincoln really went to his head! Not content with chopping trees on his ranch, playing T-Ball, and making cowboy noises in front of microphones, President Bush has taken on the role of protecting his Secret Service detail:

Bush plucks bodyguard to safety

Quite right Mr. President; it pays to be assertive in South America; after all, as your pastor told you they are Godless Catholics who'll have your wallet off you in an instant and if you drink the water you'll crap your brains out until Thursday week. I'm so glad we have you to go overseas on our behalf Mr. President so that we don't have to.....

Frankly though, the pure comedy of this aside, this story hints at the nub of America's problem in the world and why we have such a hard time diplomatically. No one is going to line up behind the big dog unless the big dog acts in a friendly way; its human nature. People root for the underdog, unless the big guy can patently show his good side. Look at the Red Sox: second highest payroll in baseball, a giant marketing franchise, and a multi million dollar sinkhole for disposable income and yet they managed to become the people's champion. George Foreman is another example of this.

Instead of this bit of savvy marketing nous (that you think would be second nature to our innovative "government of CEOs"), namely make nice and you can get your way, we have instead diplomacy by ugly American. It is as if Clark Griswold is acting as the administration's Protocol Officer. Imagine the hoopla in DC and nationwide if the President of Chile made the same demands on a visit to the States:

‘Chilean President Ricardo Lagos scrapped a gala dinner because the US was demanding that all guests must pass through metal detectors and possibly be searched.

"President Lagos considered it unacceptable that the top authorities in the country and leading businessmen be submitted to searches that are humiliating," a presidential aide told the Chilean newspaper El Mercurio”.’

Although if you come to think of it, it might be smart if the Chileans did insist on metal detectors given the expiration of the Assault Weapons Ban.

I guess we will have to continue to put up with four more years of this boorish, dangerous, and stupid behavior. Mind you, this really is the logical extension of a mind set that expects to finds a McDonalds and a Best Western in every city, that believes that we are too important to dip our flag in respect of foreign dignitaries in their own countries when we attend the Olympic Games, and allow us to think that we can invade nations at will and impose our version of democracy on them (e.g. extensive privatization, no health care, and rule by oligarchy regardless of the true intent of the electorate).

But why does Bush even bother going on these trips, when he can't even make the effort to pretend to make nice with our neighbors? Perhaps the real reason he was in South America was unfortunately highlighted by the death of the crew of a private jet that crashed this afternoon. The aircraft was en route for Houston to pick up George H.W. Bush in order to take him to Ecuador for a speech and business meetings. Thus once again, as the President visits a country or continent, the Carlyle Group and his daddy are hot on his heels….


Anonymous said...

Hey, you leave Clark Griswold out of this!
ps. Stop stealing my jokes.

Listmaker said...

i don't know weasel, after watching the studly bush push those south american pansies around, i realized that i haven't been this turned on since our superhero in command donned that flight suit.