Friday, April 14, 2006

This Is Not A Baseball Blog 12

First, the winning spam message header this week from my inbox is:

Mortify Livestock

A farmer is within his rights to shoot you or your dog for that. "Hate yew tuh doutt duntyuh, but he were mortifyin' the loivestuck, wunt'e." Mortify Livestock: sounds like a lawyer from a Dickens' novel.

Second, I saw the following headline on the BBC website this afternoon: "Therapy and kittens fail to move trapped cat." I'm glad I'm not a single man; the words "therapy" and "kittens" mentioned over a restaurant table, say, rather than in the strict context of rescuing a trapped feline, should probably indicate to a fellow that the date should be concluded as rapidly as possible. And concluded as in making excuses and leaving as opposed to consumating. Consumation on such a date always leads to restraining orders and having to grow a moustache for a disguise.

Finally, as the title suggests, a baseball lookylikey. It's hard to find a face-on picture of the Red Sox's Kevin Youkilis at bat but take it from me, from the front the likeness is uncanny:

Popeye

Youkilis

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